The Spark

26 Sep

All my life, I have had the felicitous impression of marriage thanks to my parents. I’ve heard the story of how they met, how it kind of just happened. They met through a friend, my father ‘just knew’ and a year down the line they were on their way to matrimonial happiness. Now, I know my parents didn’t live in a fairy tale world. Like other couples they had to put in quality/quantity time. I grew up knowing that their time together was important; that their relationship with each is important and is the reason I grew up in a home of shalom. But now that it’s my turn to go looking for my partner in life, I have to realize that not all people have their zivug pop into their lives one day. Some people have to go looking for their match. Some people don’t have the Spark instantaneously.

The Spark.

That gosh-forsaken-trouble-making-twinkle-in-your-eye-for-a-mere-second Spark.

You can have everything in the world in common with the person sipping a Caramel Macchiato  across from you. You can jive well and be going in the same direction and laugh at each others jokes…but the spark aint there. Is that a reason to amiably part ways or does it pay to keep going out?

On the other hand, there are times when the Spark is there immediately. You feel like you’ve met the last person you’ll ever have to date; you’re sailing through the effervescence of silly little love songs. There’s no slowing you down…until you do. Wait, s/he wears Velcro shoes? Outside? S/he could care less about the effects of Obamacare? Suddenly you’re not so sure anymore. Spark shmark. It would’ve been nice to have known each other on a more casual level before lallygagging into Disney World together.

So you see, I don’t know how I feel about the spark. Is it something caused by our preconceived notions of what is best for us or is it something inexplicably real? Is it something to be trusted or something that should be considered a sweet bonus if found?

 

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