Unofficial Shidduch Breeding Grounds

17 Aug

By now, most of my readers are probably familiar with the following four letters: USBG. I tend to sprinkle this acronym into my posts because being involved in USBGs has greatly enhanced my life. There is one USBG that I am passionately and enthusiastically involved in, but at some point or another I have been involved in most of the organizations I am about to mention. Some of them I know very little about, however, I do know of people who have met through these USBGs, so clearly they are worth mentioning. My reason for writing this post is to give more information to those who are interested in getting involved in some sort of communal organization but are unsure of which to join and where to start.

So, let’s start at the beginning.

What is a USBG?

USBG stands for Unofficial Shidduch Breeding Grounds. Unlike a singles mixer or shabbaton, the goal of a USBG is not to to make shidduchim. Each USBG has its own specific mission in which it is dedicated to carrying out. However, like a singles mixer or shabbaton, many young singles come together and subsequently get to know each other through their work. Baruch Hashem, this had lead to a lot of young men and women to their spouses.

Why would I want to join one?

To be a contributing member of  Klal Yisrael. As a young, strong, capable and religious Jew, it’s important that you give back to your people in some way. To keep a USBG running smoothly, you need more than hockers; you need the chillers, the emor-me’at-v’ase-harbei people, the zmiros leaders, the shiur writers…everyone has a place. Finding your role may take some time but it’s a worthwhile endeavor.

I know no one would actually ask this question, but if you’re hesitantly pondering it– no. I mean, you could go just to meet someone, no one is stopping you, but chances are you will be sorely disappointed. If you are not into the cause of the program, you will either:

a) Have a bad time or

b) Distract others who are there for the cause.

Is it wrong to go to an USBG and look for a shidduch?

Absolutely not. USBGs are wonderful places to find people who have the same values as you do and make valuable social connections that could lead to your future spouse. It’s a two for one deal- if you think you might be interested in getting involved with X organization and are definitely interested in opening up your social scope, go to one event and see if you like it.

How do I give one of these USBG things a shot?

Use your connections. Chances are you have a friend who has a friend who has a friend who has the ability to get you in. Work your networks; keep ’em growing. Most success and happiness, if not all, is an outgrowth of cultivating good relationships. For the places that need more protexia than other, you might need to work a little harder to get in, but if you truly are a worthy candidate of being involved in such an organization, be persistent and don’t give up. If you really want it, you’ll get it.

How do I know which USBG to get involved with?

Go based on your strengths. What do you enjoy doing? Who do you enjoy working with? What are your passions? The answers to the following questions are indicators as to how you can best contribute to the community.

In my next post, I will compile a list of several USBGs. Some of them I will write about at greater length than others, but all can be looked into further by clicking on the links provided. If you know more about any of the USBGs listed and want to add, your comments are encouraged and welcome.


One Response to “Unofficial Shidduch Breeding Grounds”

  1. harryer than them all August 20, 2010 at 5:28 pm #

    Looking forward to your list

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