Carlebach On Soul Mates

31 Jul

There’s a teaching from the Ishebitzer Rebbe in the name of The Seer of Lublin in the name of Eliayhu HaNavi that says: When you really want to ask someone for forgiveness with all your heart, you can bring them back from The Other World…But if works for love as well. If you know with all your heart that your soul mate is in this world, then your great love will bring you together from the far corners of the globe.

This is the miracle of how soul mates meet. I bless us all that we should find our soul mates. LeHaim!

Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach (from “Shlomo’s Stories” p. 95)

What makes two people bashert? How is it possible for two people to “just know” that they are meant to be one? Because when two people want to make a relationship work with every ounce of their life’s breath, when two people put in all their heart, all their soul and everything they’ve got, then time and space become mere pebbles along the way . What once might have appeared to be tremendous boulders are easily trampled by the steadfast pact these two souls have made. Is it G-d’s will that makes a couple bashert?  The only way to get a proper answer for this question is to bolster it with another question– what is the definition of bashert? Is it simply bringing two people together or is it creating a lifelong relationship?

If the answer is simply bringing two people together, then of course Hashem is totally in control of our bashert. He is in control of everything, this aspect are of our lives included. However, there is one area in our lives that He does not take the reins, and that is in whether we become tzaddikim or…not tzaddikim. Whether we choose work on ourselves every day of our lives, or whether we choose to proclaim– “this is who I am, and that is final.” The only way for two to become one is for each individual to shed his identity as an individual and join as one entity. It takes more than the Divine will of G-d. It takes passionate yet bridled strength of the heart; two people who want to be together with every ounce of their life’s breath. Two people who will not allow the nisyonot of the world to come between them. As much as I praise and applaud rationality and practicality, I do not underestimate the power of love. I am well aware of its immense power; how it inspires one to overcome every obstacle with vigor and might. When you want something badly enough, when you know unwaveringly that it is real and true, Hashem bends the laws of His world in ways we never before fathomed. Hashem brings us to our basherts, but it is us who keeps our marriages bashert for the rest of our lives.


2 Responses to “Carlebach On Soul Mates”

  1. aminspiration August 2, 2010 at 6:57 am #

    it definitely has to do with wanting it, wanting it badly. Men and women are so different on so many different levels that the only way it can ever possibly work is to be committed to the end. i was saw this interview with will smith and he was saying the reason his marriage has been so successful especially in a divorce happy Hollywood world, is because divorce was never an option. I think that is a powerful lesson. if your goal is to make the marriage work no matter what (abuse chas v’shalom aside) then it will.

    people make the mistake that marriage is easy like when u played as a child, but it requires real work and effort on both parts to make it great!

  2. ZZTop August 2, 2010 at 7:16 am #

    SYAS usernames are just for your own use. Make them whatever you want.

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